Last week, I woke up in the night under attack. Under attack from the Inner Critic, it has been a journey for me. But I used to see the Inner Critic as truth. Not anymore, because now I recognize it for the destructive thing that it is now.
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Are you hard on yourself? Do you extend yourself so compassionately toward others but put yourself through the wringer?
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We do that right?! Some of the most compassionate women I know lack compassion for themselves, by letting the inner critic take the reins.
Myths About the Inner Critic
~Myth: It inspires helpful change. Truth: It is more likely to cause discomfort and poor decision making to get rid of the discomfort.
~Myth: It is a helpful resource for being healthier. Truth: The intense criticism that can come from it can increase our stress hormones, which are damaging to our immune system and some of the organs in our body.
~Myth: It is a reflection of who we really are. Truth: Our brains replay the things we tell ourselves are true regardless of whether they are actually true. Truth: Truth should come from a reliable source. The critiques that your brain produces are probably not a reliable source for what is true about you.
Shut Out the Inner Critic
1) Write out what it is telling you then:
a)Identify anything learning to take away
b)Identify and call out the blatant lies
2) Sing the criticisms to the tune of “Happy Birthday”- sometimes the criticisms are so downright ridiculous and untrue treating them as ridiculous as they are can break the hold they have on us.
3)Stop the criticisms and tell them you will not listen to them. Put your mind on truths of who you are. This could be Bible verses (i.e. “I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”), vision statement about who you are and what is important to you, or “I am _________” and “I am not ___________” statements
Be persistent! Whatever, strategies you choose it will take time and regularly using them to rework the thoughts your brain gives you. Let’s chat if you need more information or support for what this looks like for you.